It occurs to me today that life can be so much simpler than humans consider it to be. Our downfall is that we can ponder the meaning of life, that we have evolved a brain that entertains abstract thought. What most scientists believe is humans are at the top of the evolutionary ladder since we have this capacity. It is in fact, the human downfall.
We spend so much time trying to unlock the meaning of life, of our own minuscule lives, that we miss the best part; just being.
Why am I writing about this on my dog blog, you ask. Well, watch a dog for a few minutes and you will observe the best way to "be". With each step a canine takes, they don't wonder "what if that step was my last", they just know that it wasn't and take another step. They look at us and are happy, truly happy. Why? Well, if the relationship has been developed the appropriate way, then they know that you are family. And they LOVE family. The best, pure and simple, love; no thought about tomorrow, or even the next minute. They live and love now, and now, and again now: not then and not tomorrow, but NOW.
It isn't easy, for humans to do this, but try and you will witness a sense of relief that you have been searching, humanly for. If you can do this, however briefly, it will bring harmony into you and, therefore, your life and relationships, human and otherwise.
The great teacher is your CFM (Canine Family Member).
Thank him, hug him and, simply, love him.
Tuesday, June 11, 2013
Monday, November 29, 2010
# 3
So now that you decided that a CFM (Canine Family Member) should be invited into your home; it's time to talk serious training-Potty Training! It's generally not referred to as Housebreaking anymore since we have discovered a kinder, gentler way to teach this very important, and for most pups, first official trained behavior. Some things to remember, dogs don't generally urinate or defecate in anger or revenge; it may seem that way, but truthfully, it is usually stress or medical condition(s) that cause this unwanted behavior.
Step 1) UNDERSTANDING that your new family member is completely unsure of her new surroundings and, as a matter of fact, you and your role in her life. Accidents from dogs of all ages can be expected during the first day or so (longer for pups) until they realize that your house is now her home. Introduce her to every room in the home and spend some time with her in each room so that your scents become entwined together and she will realize that your home is her new home and for older dogs, sometimes that is all it takes to potty train. For others, and for younger pups, this stage of training is crucial to having a well mannered family member. Anger serves no purpose here and will only increase the number of accidents and can do permanent damage to her social skills; DONOT GET ANGRY!!! More in my next post...
Step 1) UNDERSTANDING that your new family member is completely unsure of her new surroundings and, as a matter of fact, you and your role in her life. Accidents from dogs of all ages can be expected during the first day or so (longer for pups) until they realize that your house is now her home. Introduce her to every room in the home and spend some time with her in each room so that your scents become entwined together and she will realize that your home is her new home and for older dogs, sometimes that is all it takes to potty train. For others, and for younger pups, this stage of training is crucial to having a well mannered family member. Anger serves no purpose here and will only increase the number of accidents and can do permanent damage to her social skills; DONOT GET ANGRY!!! More in my next post...
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
#2
The first, and most important, ingredient in a well behaved puppy or dog is LOVE. Dogs are NOT mantle pieces acquired to decorate our homes, nor should we take them in to enable an irresponsible child to shirk the responsibility of having a pet.
All too often I have seen dogs mistreated, talked poorly of, and even struck out of frustration and resentment. This is NOT appropriate and is the equivalent to child abuse! If a dog is "dropped into your lap" through the actions of an irresponsible human child of yours and you do not want to put in the time and effort necessary to raise the dog to be well behaved and polite; it is YOUR job to find her a loving home where she will be treated as part of the family, not as a burden to it. One thing to remember is that dogs are not actually mature, emotionally, until they are about 2 years old. Until that time, they will want to play constantly and will have HUGE amounts of energy! This is not a behavioral issue; it is completely natural and should not be discouraged.
As their parents, we must provide the essentials: food, water, PLAY TIME, and LOVE!!! If you are not able to meet the energy needs of your new family member, the best you can do is find a home that can meet that need. This will reduce your frustration and theirs. Keeping the dog with whom you cannot or will not play is cruel and unacceptable. Research the breed you are considering BEFORE you adopt to ensure a good match. If necessary, hire a professional to work with you on determining the appropriate breed for your family. For instance, if you are retired and not very active, perhaps that really cute Golden Retriever puppy you are thinking about is NOT a good idea since they can run tirelessly for hours and, if not exercised appropriately, they can seem to be unmanageable. You would be too if you were a youngster the age of 5 or so and required to sit in the house all day as the new world passes you by. Imagine the frustration of then being allowed to go outside, but only to relieve yourself and no play! Do yourself a favor---if you have adopted the wrong kind of dog, find it a more appropriate home and start over with another, more appropriate breed. You and the dog will be happier. Also, excuses such as, "we don't have the heart to give her up", are only self-inflating statementswhich make us appear to be martyrs for our dogs, when, in fact, we are being cruel and selfish. If you have thought or said that followed by some negative statement relating to how "wild" she is, you have the wrong dog. Do yourself, and the dog, a favor and FIND HER A NEW, MORE APPROPRIATE HOME. There is nothing wrong with admitting that the dog you have is not the type of dog that you can handle. It is far worse to keep her and expect her to change her core being for you. It won't happen and it will most likely ruin her. No one admires a self made martyr; so don't be one!
That said, training your new family member is going to take time and, most importantly, PATIENCE! Dogs don't speak human and humans don't speak dog, at least not initially. However, through this reading material, you will come as close as humanly possible to “speaking dog”, on her level while she will come to understand exactly what you are requesting. Mind you, I use the work requesting very loosely. What I truly mean is commanding. We do not ask our dogs to behave, we teach them to respond appropriately to our cues so that they become well balanced, well behaved, and polite members of our families as a matter of course, without needing constant reminders of how to be such. Now on to the meat of the course… speaking Dog.
Let’s start with a lesson on how canines communicate. Have you ever seen a dog tell another dog to leave her food dish alone? Was it verbal, physical or both? Most likely, it was; a growl, a head tilt, and a snap. In my house, this behavior is tolerated as long as it does not get out of control. If dog # 2 does not understand, due to age or prior isolation, I monitor the interaction to prevent her from getting hurt. When the correction is issued by dog #1, dog 2 should move away and accept that the food bowl is off limits. If dog 2 persists, there will be a fight…therefore, I intervene and issue a human correction by removing dog 2, via body blocks, from the area and showing her where her food bowl is. This correction may have to be issued more than once before she catches on; BE PERSISTENT and you will be successful in training your dogs whose bowl is whose. This is lesson 1 and a very important lesson to have harmony at meal time, which can be a very chaotic time unless YOU take control.
The object of the lesson is not only to show you how to have peace at meal time, but also to illustrate canine communication. Dog 1 did not say, in English, “get away from my bowl”; but instead used canine communication to get the point across. Dogs communicate via body language and various audible cues such as growling and barking. More often than not, they will use a combination of the two to get their point across. IT IS IMPERATIVE THAT YOU REMEMBER THIS WHILE TRAINING YOUR CANINE! One of the most common mistakes humans make with their companions is their body language contradicts their intended message. Consequently, the companion has no idea what it is supposed to do and will fail the exercise.
All too often I have seen dogs mistreated, talked poorly of, and even struck out of frustration and resentment. This is NOT appropriate and is the equivalent to child abuse! If a dog is "dropped into your lap" through the actions of an irresponsible human child of yours and you do not want to put in the time and effort necessary to raise the dog to be well behaved and polite; it is YOUR job to find her a loving home where she will be treated as part of the family, not as a burden to it. One thing to remember is that dogs are not actually mature, emotionally, until they are about 2 years old. Until that time, they will want to play constantly and will have HUGE amounts of energy! This is not a behavioral issue; it is completely natural and should not be discouraged.
As their parents, we must provide the essentials: food, water, PLAY TIME, and LOVE!!! If you are not able to meet the energy needs of your new family member, the best you can do is find a home that can meet that need. This will reduce your frustration and theirs. Keeping the dog with whom you cannot or will not play is cruel and unacceptable. Research the breed you are considering BEFORE you adopt to ensure a good match. If necessary, hire a professional to work with you on determining the appropriate breed for your family. For instance, if you are retired and not very active, perhaps that really cute Golden Retriever puppy you are thinking about is NOT a good idea since they can run tirelessly for hours and, if not exercised appropriately, they can seem to be unmanageable. You would be too if you were a youngster the age of 5 or so and required to sit in the house all day as the new world passes you by. Imagine the frustration of then being allowed to go outside, but only to relieve yourself and no play! Do yourself a favor---if you have adopted the wrong kind of dog, find it a more appropriate home and start over with another, more appropriate breed. You and the dog will be happier. Also, excuses such as, "we don't have the heart to give her up", are only self-inflating statementswhich make us appear to be martyrs for our dogs, when, in fact, we are being cruel and selfish. If you have thought or said that followed by some negative statement relating to how "wild" she is, you have the wrong dog. Do yourself, and the dog, a favor and FIND HER A NEW, MORE APPROPRIATE HOME. There is nothing wrong with admitting that the dog you have is not the type of dog that you can handle. It is far worse to keep her and expect her to change her core being for you. It won't happen and it will most likely ruin her. No one admires a self made martyr; so don't be one!
That said, training your new family member is going to take time and, most importantly, PATIENCE! Dogs don't speak human and humans don't speak dog, at least not initially. However, through this reading material, you will come as close as humanly possible to “speaking dog”, on her level while she will come to understand exactly what you are requesting. Mind you, I use the work requesting very loosely. What I truly mean is commanding. We do not ask our dogs to behave, we teach them to respond appropriately to our cues so that they become well balanced, well behaved, and polite members of our families as a matter of course, without needing constant reminders of how to be such. Now on to the meat of the course… speaking Dog.
Let’s start with a lesson on how canines communicate. Have you ever seen a dog tell another dog to leave her food dish alone? Was it verbal, physical or both? Most likely, it was; a growl, a head tilt, and a snap. In my house, this behavior is tolerated as long as it does not get out of control. If dog # 2 does not understand, due to age or prior isolation, I monitor the interaction to prevent her from getting hurt. When the correction is issued by dog #1, dog 2 should move away and accept that the food bowl is off limits. If dog 2 persists, there will be a fight…therefore, I intervene and issue a human correction by removing dog 2, via body blocks, from the area and showing her where her food bowl is. This correction may have to be issued more than once before she catches on; BE PERSISTENT and you will be successful in training your dogs whose bowl is whose. This is lesson 1 and a very important lesson to have harmony at meal time, which can be a very chaotic time unless YOU take control.
The object of the lesson is not only to show you how to have peace at meal time, but also to illustrate canine communication. Dog 1 did not say, in English, “get away from my bowl”; but instead used canine communication to get the point across. Dogs communicate via body language and various audible cues such as growling and barking. More often than not, they will use a combination of the two to get their point across. IT IS IMPERATIVE THAT YOU REMEMBER THIS WHILE TRAINING YOUR CANINE! One of the most common mistakes humans make with their companions is their body language contradicts their intended message. Consequently, the companion has no idea what it is supposed to do and will fail the exercise.
the beginning
The first task to do Before obtaining your new family member is to make sure your lifestyle supports the addition. The worst excuse for returning a pup or, worse yet, surrendering him to a shelter, is "I just don't have time". YOU SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT BEFORE INVITING THIS TRUSTING, LOVING CREATURE INTO YOUR LIFE!
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